My wife has an amazing nose. I’d be willing to bet that, given the chance, bloodhounds would look to her when they loose a scent trail. I don’t even argue any longer when she says she smells something in the house that isn’t quite right – I think she even picked up carbon monoxide once, which is so damned impressive it doesn’t require comment.
So last night I’m sitting on the couch/recliner resting my once weary legs (they’re back!) and she leans over the back to give me a kind of upside-down Spider Man kiss and she takes in a deep breath and says the strangest thing… “What did I buy you that smells so good, it’s like a woodsy scent”.
The truth is, my wife didn’t buy anything. I’ve been using the same deodorant, soap and shampoo for quite some time… What she’s smelling the sweet scent of awesome. It’s a scientific hypothesis that once a human being fills up with awesome, it begins emminating from one’s pores – kind of like after you get really hammered and the booze smell seeps from the pores the next day, only substitute the beer with awesome. That’s me.
This is not an easy state to exist in. Normal people don’t like awesome people because they can feel less-than in the presence of awesomeness. I should know, I had an exceptional friend (from whom I’ve learned the art of accepting awesome) who made even me feel a little out-of-sorts – and that’s not easily done. I, being awesome in my own right however, did not seek to tear this great man down to my level as most less-than-awesome people do – if that were even possible, he was on a plain of awesome rarely achieved. No, I sought to learn from the man. At first I had to fake it until I made it, but as I worked with him (and two of his best friends who were almost equally awesome – it was like a smorgasbord of awesomeness within a 50 mile radius) I began to change, to learn the mystical ways of actually being awesome. The delicate balance between work and play, between strong and caring, between knowing and seeking knowledge, dealing with success – and learning from failure… But there’s one part that I haven’t quite gotten right yet. It’s the one thing that takes a fellow from being filled up, to the point of awesome pore seepage to being entirely comprised of awesome at a cellular level. I’m talking from one’s baby toenail all the way to the tallest hair on one’s head.
I seek the ability to be so comfortable my own awesomeness that I immediately make almost everyone in the room more awesome just by setting foot in it. And that part won’t have anything to do with anything within the confines of my skin. The one quality my buddy had that I seek to pursue is the ability to help someone else feel better about themselves simply by allowing them to be the most important person in the room at a given moment. That is what separates the men from the boys and the ladies from the girls. I’ve only seen this in a very few people – it’s so very rare… That’s the quality that made me feel uneasy, that when he and I were engaged in conversation, he made me feel as though nothing in the world mattered but… me. The patience required to do this is astounding. It requires being completely at peace with oneself to the point that the only thing you’re thinking about is the person that you’re having a conversation with right in front of you.
Case in point, and I’ll use my own wife as an example. We’re talking last night and I’m trying to watch Shark Week and hold a conversation with her at the same time. I’ve got one eye on the tube and one on her. This is just last night. Now, I should have tuned the TV out (or turned it off), had I been working my awesomeness correctly… OR say the conversation was getting a little long-winded. I very well could have listened for a minute and then said that I’d love to give her my full attention, but I’m finding Shark Week incredibly interesting, could we continue the conversation during a break… That’s what my buddy would have done.
My buddy Mike died due to cancer a few years ago and I’m still trying to live up to the example that he set. I don’t know if I’ll ever get there, but I can damn well guarantee you if I don’t I’ll die trying. I’ve obviously got a lot of work to do. I have a hard time woking that at home.