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Being A Gentleman In The Age Of Sexism


I’ve been trying to bone up on sexism, to get myself abreast with the current events that dictate how I should and should not behave towards what I used to be able to call the fairer sex, but would now be limited to, said fairly, the other sex. How unfortunate.

See, it would be OK for me to say that taking the garbage out is a man’s job without being labeled a sexist by 95 percent of women, but only because taking the garbage out, sucks. Should the garbage not suck to take out, were the task fun, then it IS sexist to believe that I should indeed take the garbage out, for what man could make the extraordinary leap that a woman is incapable of taking a bag or can of garbage out to the curb?! Me without my muff!

The reality is, as I showed beyond a reasonable doubt the other day, anything a man says or does, about anything, can be argued to be sexist in one way or another, and it is this way by design. Without changing the structure of the argument, we men literally cannot win.

The definition of sexism used to be quite simple until men caught on and started showing exactly how sexist women can be by using their very arguments against them. Then came the hilarious “change” in definition, an addition which turned the whole meat of the discussion on its head and injected some much-needed ambiguity into the subject: Power.

The notion here is that men have power over women in some way, a power that women cannot possibly have or obtain, so therefore only men can be sexist.  It has been said that behind every great man is a great woman. In terms of this so-called “power”, behind every great woman is a man using this mystical power to hold a woman back from achieving her true potential greatness – as if I am somehow a part of a giant cabal simply because I was born a male of the species.  What a bunch of poppycock.

Well, surely as a new leak will spring when you plug a hole in a dike with your finger, the charge of sexism will find a new way to break through – it can be aimed at you for seemingly the most mundane of offenses.  Now this isn’t to deny the existence of sexism, nor is my intention to poke fun at it, unmercifully at least. As gentlemen, we are always fair and courteous to those whom we first meet and after, prove themselves worthy of such courtesy. The question posed to men who truly care is this: How can we be gentlemen in a time when just the simple act of being gentlemanly can earn you the scorn of a vapid feminist with charges of benevolent sexism (A seemingly favorable attitude that puts women on a pedestal but sometimes conveys an assumption that women need men’s protection)?  The problem here is that if you’re not a benevolent sexist then you’re probably a plain old sexist, and the latter is much, much worse (see the post linked earlier).

The answer is quite simple, gentlemen. You play the odds! And what guy doesn’t like a good gamble now and again?  The proper way to go about life is to be a gentleman towards the fairer sex (oops, there I go again) at all times.  Period.  This doesn’t mean you have to put up with a bunch of crap or act like a door mat would.  You open doors for a lady, you bow when appropriate, and you treat her as if she were a queen.  If, after having done so, you are accused of being a sexist, I would recommend running for the hills as if your pants were on fire, for there is a very good chance she simply has an insurmountable resentment against men. We hope, of course, that this happens before you invest in a ring for that finger.

The reality is, as far as sexism goes against we keepers of the cojones, most that is to be worried about or trifled with is around the fringes. That is to say, the vast majority of women are more than capable of distinguishing the difference between a gentleman and a sexist – it’s that 5 to 10%, the crazies, that you have to look out for – they haven’t got a clue, and you can bet, they’re pissed about it.

Now, as a final note to those far-left fringe feminists themselves:  Please ladies, don’t be hyper sensitive and go ballistic at the tiniest infraction.  Most of us normal folk don’t mean what we say the way you perceive it and we certainly don’t want a battle.


  1. magnuminsp says:

    The “10% crowd” will always be there. I did a paper in middle school about how 10% of the population serves no purpose and just seem to be there to mess things up for everyone else.

    There will always be someone who has to make a big deal about nothing.

    Sorry ladies, I am with Jim. I open doors, tell women they look pretty on occasion, and do all sorts of things that I was taught to do, to be polite. If one woman gets offended, sorry….

    Here is a story I am sure you will appreciate!
    A few years ago, we had this girl who wanted to do everything the boys did. She wanted to play on the mens league hockey team with us, as an example. She also, when she played golf with us, always would play from the same tees as the men.

    One day, her and I were playing a round of golf and came to the 15th hole of this course. The hole is a short par 3, 120 yards. In order to hit the green, you have to fly the ball over about a 75 yard canal.

    She gets up and hits the first ball short, into the water. She wanted me to get her another ball from her bag, and being as I was in the middle of taking a drink of a Tequila Sunrise, I just tossed her one of mine that was in the cart. She put that one in the water in the same manner as the first. I threw her another ball, and another, and another. Finally, after she put the sixth ball in the water, I took the next ball and threw it over to the ladies tees and told her to go hit from over there……where you belong!

    She flipped out, called me a sexist pig, male chauvinistic pig, a few other names I can’t print here, and that was all she said for the remainder of the round to me!

    She got over it…..eventually! We are still friends and she lives up the street from me now.

    • bgddyjim says:

      That might have been a little harsh, but funny nonetheless… I’d have given her the fifteen on the par three and kept my mouth shut, or given her the driver out of her bag after the second went into the water… 😉

      Though I will say this – the golf course is no place to learn how to golf. If she couldn’t fly 75 yards of water in six tries she belonged at the driving range, not on the white tees. You must have the patience of a saint to make it 15 holes.

    • bgddyjim says:

      Oh, by the way, that paper you did about the folks who are around just to mess things up – that’s a brilliant way of looking at it! I’m going to stick that one in the quiver for later. Thanks.

  2. Shonnie says:

    Gentlemen … should just be gentlemen … let the vapid fems be vapid. The rest of us appreciate manners. There was an imbalance of power between men and women during my parents age group and some of my early years in the workforce, but that never stopped me. I think whining about sexisim is a total BORE! My hubby is a gentleman. He opens doors for me, pulls out my chair … shows me favor and KNOWS that I am a strong, tough, business woman who he likes having by his side. 😀

    Let the women who find that offensive just be offended — they are being small and petty. I don’t need a man to treat me like a man to know I am strong and capable. I am not looking for some approval — that is what I think people who wig out about that are doing. It is just plain silly. Rock on Gentlemen!

  3. Sorry.. my mind got sidetracked in your first sentence when you said “get myself abreast” and all I could think of was if you got two abreasts you’d have much more insight into what women think. 🙂

  4. elisariva says:

    Finally catching up on my reading. Two things – first – I would much rather take out the garbage than wash dishes. Second – I don’t know if you did it on purpose, but you used several phrases/words that would totally anger militant feminists. I was laughing out loud!!

  5. […] of it today came thanks to a fellow blogger. Jim at Fit Recovery every once in a while writes a post that comes out of left (or right?) field. With the correct focus I read through the words and […]

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