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Speaking of Cool Bikes…

May 2014

Go ahead and Google “cool bikes” and you’ll get a bunch of crap bikes that might be enticing to a patchouli wearing, veggie crunching hipster but would be useless to a road cycling enthusiast – I’d sooner install a basket and panniers on my 5200 than ride a city/urban bike.

Now, please don’t take me the wrong way here; I have nothing against the hipsters, veggie munchers or the sit-up gang (referring to the posture atop the bicycle). I just don’t have a desire to ride anything that slow unless there is a 75% chance of getting muddy in addition to riding on dirt tracks with staggeringly ridiculous root strewn climbs and harrowing rock studded descents.  It’s just how I roll.  It’s my genes’ fault.

With the exception of that first link (I looked through every link on the first page) though, most everything was dull or dumb – that first link actually has some promise.  Of all the links that I looked at, my least favorite bike of all was “Basszilla”, a bicycle with enough speaker to deafen you and piss off your neighbors so much that they’d be likely to put you out of your misery permanently. That first link though, well you be the judge:

Now that’s a cool bike. Put some drop bars and brifters on that sexy thing and you’ve really got something. It’s claimed to be a Time Trial bike by ORYX but on closer inspection it’s more of a cross between a track bike and a TT bike because it’s only a single speed. The chain ring and crank is enclosed in the bike frame and rather than a Quick Release skewer, the wheels have a pushbutton release. There are some drivetrain issues I’d need to see worked out, namely the addition of a ten or eleven speed rear end and a two speed chain ring to allow for heavy climbing but I’d buy that bike in a second if it was priced within my reach.

Oh yeah, and it’s a rightie:

Oh, and if you haven’t seen this article before, here are ten tips to avoid looking uncool


  1. saltyvelo says:

    I can’t wait to read your article on recumbents! And yes, I’m thinking of getting one.

    • bgddyjim says:

      Recumbents are awesome! We ride with a guy who’s got a fully enclosed, fiberglass recumbent – he averages 26-28 mph on that monster and he can wind it up to the 30’s when he tries. Cost him something like $15,000 though.

      On another note, I was hoping your infinite experience might help a friend out… He was cruising along and his chain got sucked up into his drivetrain causing his rear wheel to pull out of the dropouts. He crashed pretty bad but is okay. He thinks he’s found the culprit: What a fall has taught me PedalWORKS:

  2. None of the bikes thickled my fancy. Looks too much like TRON bikes and I did not care for the movie.

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