Jabrill Peppers from the University of Michigan football team may find himself in hot water after “tweeting” about an incident with a feminist. The woman became incensed that he held the door open for her. Of course, I have a tough time imagining a life so good that this is what I have to choose to be angry about, but I digress.
The kerfuffle brings up a very interesting point, of course. Most men, as boys, are taught as much by their mothers to hold doors open for women as their fathers and typically it’s the father who backs the mother’s lesson up as the “right thing to do”. In fact, in Jabrill’s case, he was raised solely by his mother (or so his tweet says).
Often the debate turns to “should men hold the door open for women”. It is a mistake to get drawn into this. Of course men should – without exception. We should also, should we meet someone like the woman who chose to take offense at something so innocuous as a man respecting a woman by holding the door open for her, feel sorry for women of that nature who are so misled, misguided and disgruntled. Think of how angry you have to be inside to get upset that someone holds the door for you! Think of how little these people think of themselves that the act of a person holding the door open for them signifies anything thing more than, “After you”. The truth is, that’s rather sad.
Mrs. Bgddy added that it’s not about a person’s sex, and I agree (in word and deed) that it’s not even about men holding the door for women, we hold the door for any person because it’s the right thing to do, it’s courteous. Secondly, she stated that “anyone can tell themselves any story they want about why you’re holding the door, hopefully it’s just that you’re doing it because you’re a nice person”. Amen to that.
The Cultural Issue…
The issue was raised yesterday on a sports talk radio show that I listen to, what do you do in terms of respecting other cultures in terms of holding a door open? The instance they used, obviously, was Middle Eastern, mainly because they’re often easily identifiable by the clothes they wear… So, being in America, should I not hold the door for women who are required by their religion to wear the traditional Muslim garb of subservience?
Now that’s an interesting pickle from my perspective isn’t it? I’m just an every-day American mutt, how should I know whether or not I should open a door for a Muslim woman?
Here’s how this works: I am an American in America, the U.S.A. It is our custom that we hold doors open for women. If other cultures don’t like that, well they came to the wrong country. If I were to move to France or Italy, I wouldn’t expect them to change for me because to expect so would be stupid. It’s that simple. I will not now or forever more, refrain from holding the door for a woman, under pain of arrest and persecution, because the act offends such a tiny sliver of a minority of granola crunching feminists that to worry myself over it becomes ludicrous. In a world where we need more good, I won’t choose otherwise for a ridiculous few. Hell, could you imagine? A French Newspaper: “Big Daddy Jim of Fit Recovery fame (LOL!) just arrived in France. He finds body odor offensive so quick, everyone put on your deodorant for the week he’ll be here”. Yeah right.
If you disagree, answer this question for me: Should I disrespect my mother who taught me that to hold the door open for ladies was a display of respect?
You have the right to be upset at whatever you choose, it’s a free country. On the other hand, I have the right to ignore you. If you’re one of those who thinks I’m going to throw being a decent human being under the bus in support of whatever silly agenda or cultural difference you may have, well you’ve got the wrong guy. In this ever-changing radical environment that pits women against men at every turn that has been created by ridiculous fringe groups and grotesquely silly “intellectuals”, the old adage holds true: “No good deed goes unpunished”.
In the end, my wife is the only woman I answer to so I’ll defer to her. Well, let me amend that… My wife first and then both of our mothers (if they don’t clash with my wife) are the only women I answer to.
UPDATE: It must be said, this post assumes that the man in this situation is not being a cad. It assumes that the male is respectful. Catcalls, whistling, grunting, the checking out of bodily parts, etc. all fall under “being a cad”.
UPDATE 2: A person who goes by “browney237” commented that taking offense to someone holding the door open is a perfect example of a “first-world problem”. Exactly.
Not much bad to say about the start of this cycling season – I couldn’t have wished for a better start. Three days in, just a hair under 90 miles (I rounded up by a half-mile or so)… We had our first club ride last night and it was brutal. At first it looked like we’d be treated to a rather subdued ride with several of the guys I ride with in the parking lot tending to their steed and getting bundled up for a chilly ride.
I say chilly but it was 45… Last week it was like 20 though, in the sunshine, midday. The week before that the mercury was hiding in the bottom of the thermometer, afraid to show it’s red ass. In other words, it was arm warmers, leg warmers, jersey and a vest “chilly”.
We started out with an excellent 16 mph easy seven mile warmup. I warmed up easily, just enough to be comfortable, within maybe five minutes. By the time we got back, the parking lot had filled to capacity with the heavy hitters – so much for an easy first club ride.
I started out up front to get my first turn out of the way early… At least that was the plan. When I fell back a hole opened up about three riders back with a train of guys deciding to hide this one out. “F@ck it, if that’s the way it’s gonna be, you never get fast at the back.”, I thought. I took that spot and pulled like a mule every time I got to the front and it sucked. I made it 14 awesome miles before I’d had enough. Fortunately my buddy Mike dropped before me so when I turned around to take a shortcut, I bumped into him quickly. I whipped around and got onto his wheel.
I had a tough time for the entire rest of the ride, all the way back to the finish line. I pulled out front when I had to but they were short, usually 3/4 of a mile to maybe a mile and a half for the longer tries. I did my very best and finished absolutely smoked. Mike really bailed me out after I went out way too strong to start. We hit the finish line at 29 miles and some change at a 20 mph average, right on the nose. Considering the temperature (it cooled off as the evening progressed), that I was on my Trek and that last year the first club ride average was below 18.5 mph, last night was a huge gain over last year. I haven’t even pulled out the Venge yet!
A few items of note:
1. While the ride was hard and it did hurt a lot, it wasn’t as bad as last year’s first ride in terms of my legs giving me problems.
2. Even though I spent more than twice the time up front than I did in last year’s opening ride in those first 14 miles last night, I was able to hang on longer than I did last year.
3. All but two of my friends fell off before I did – and those two spent most of the ride hiding at the back.
4. I’m in really good shape this spring.
Oh great interval workout, I shall never doubt thee again.
For the first time, quite possibly in more than a decade, when the alarm went off this morning I fell back to sleep for twenty minutes before I caught myself and woke up. I still made it into the office with 25 minutes to spare, but my God is it nice to be tired! I won’t be able to keep this torrid pace up of course. I’ve only ever crested 800 miles in a month one time (maybe twice) and I’d top 900 if I had the time to keep this up.