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Nobody Ever Lost an Ounce Making a Plan…


Trigger (heh) Warning:  This post isn’t for weak-kneed, lilly-livered whiners.  It isn’t for diaper wetters who would rather sit in a pissed-in diaper than change it.  This is a post for big boys and girls.  Buck up, camper.  I do apoligize for the title.  It’s click-bait.  You have been Trigger (heh) Warned.

F@CK!  I know a guy.  Dude is fat, lazy, full of excuses.  He’s a pretty great person and he is going to die soon.  His body is starting to shut down on him.
I’ve wanted to shake him violently and slap him a few times when he got into the excuses.  He suffered under the delusion that going for a walk or a bike ride would hurt, all the while I knew the truth:  Laying on my fat ass for a few weeks hurts way worse than it does ten minutes after a sub-five hour hundred miles… and for those who don’t know, that hurts

Ten minutes after 107 Miles

Two seconds after 72 miles… after 100 miles the day before, 99 the day before and 106 the day before

My friends, a friend I ride with rode through chemotherapy.  He said it was the only thing that made the nausea tolerable.  He wasn’t fast, but he was out there.

Another friend of mine was riding on his trainer six weeks after open heart surgery.  Two weeks after that he was on the road holding a 16 mph average on beta blockers.

Another friend was out mowing lawns with a push mower days after having a pacemaker installed in his chest.

I fell at work Tuesday.  I landed on my ankle after a 1-1/2 foot drop…   Not on the side of my foot, I landed on my ankle and the outside of my foot.  One of those stupid things – I should have been paying better attention and a temporary ramp should have been built.  There shouldn’t have been a drop-off.  That said, my ankle crumpled and I ended up on the concrete on my back.  I tried to walk it off, covering three miles on site before heading home to ice it.  I took yesterday off the bike (not work) and I’ll be riding again later today.  I have a 50 mile ride tomorrow that I won’t miss because it’ll be raining Saturday and snowing Sunday.  Trainer days.

I found this photo in a post:

Thinking about a plan also does no good at keeping my ass thin and out of a doctor’s office.  Action does.

Ladies and gentlemen, the guy with the pacemaker once told me (shortly after the operation), “It’s real easy to talk tough about dying… till the bus shows up”.  This encapsulates the insidious nature of obesity.

Get out the f@ckin’ door.

And if you’re one of those made to sit through those donut shop lies, don’t.  Reject them for the bullshit they are.  Chances are, someone you give a shit about’s life depends on it.  Literally.  You won’t be liked… Until your liar sees the light and thanks you for being an asshole.  Trust me.

Sorry.  I miss having my platform a lot more than I thought I would.  

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17 Comments

  1. mmpalepale says:

    Take no prisoners!!!

  2. Gail says:

    You’ve got to know that there is absolutely nothing I dislike about this post. Thank God you’re still writing. I had hatched a plot whereby I was going to occasionally write about bike clubs in my area and how horrible they are. I was hoping you’d see and have to write a rebuttal post. Looks like this won’t be necessary. Thank goodness for that, as I softened quite a bit on my prior stance. You might even say flip flopped or evolved. Hah!

  3. Sue Slaght says:

    I’m thinking you have returned? 😊

  4. Mark says:

    It snowed here yesterday and the temperatures are below freezing. I am going for a bike ride tomorrow in my shorts. No trainer for this guy. No stopping me after this post. I think I will put it on continuous plan. Good job.

  5. PTcontender says:

    This made me laugh lol love the truth & tough love here

  6. Eric Kelsey says:

    This reminded of a cyclist I’m friends with on Facebook who always post’s about wanting to lose weight and comes up short every time and always gains weight instead. Once again he plans on using the winter season this year to drop all the weight. I’d hate to tell him the “real” truth but if you didn’t have the motivation to do it in the summer time when the whether was great for cycling outdoors what makes you think you can do it on a boring trainer inside during a harsh Wisconsin winter? Also have to take in the fact that in winter climates people tend to eat more when its cold plus you have the holidays to deal with. I like anyone else can find a thousand reason’s why I shouldn’t train on any given day and I wouldn’t discourage him but its not the words that are going to do it for you.

    If it gets to the point where I’m really struggling with motivation I get on the bike first thing after waking up in the morning and ride has fast has I can before I have time to think about why I shouldn’t be doing it.

    • bgddyjim says:

      Thanks Eric, that’s definitely the best way to do it, take off early, dead into the wind so it can push you home… Even I struggle with motivation if I wait past 10 am.

      Thanks for commenting, brother. Ride hard! I just got back from my first “holy crap, what am I doing out here” ride of the season. Light snow, 20 mph wind, and COLD.

  7. Lana_SHON says:

    Great post! I love it.

  8. fitnessgrad says:

    Jim,
    How is it going? Every now and then I see you pop your head in on one of my post and I realize you might have visited just long enough to say helloo:)
    Always proud of your honesty and the winning title that got everyone’s attention. I was hoping I would see a comment with someone getting upset over this post, so I could be like “life is tough and bubble wrap hinders”, I am happy that the ONE person who needed to read it, had the chance.

    Shay-lon

    • bgddyjim says:

      I’m good Shay-lon. I’ve been enjoying the break and spending all of that extra time working. I still do check out people’s posts as often as I can. 😉

      Thank you for dropping a line.

      • fitnessgrad says:

        Jim,
        I am happy to hear the good news, also thank you for popping in, I am sure all your followers, including myself miss your daily blog post but manage to still think this post every so often thing is okay too 😀

  9. Anon says:

    Well Jim, it’s just over a year since I got cycling, I’m not throwing down any big rides yet but I’m a lot fitter, healthier and happier (punctures notwithstanding) than I was this time last year, and I think it’s fair to say your encouragement, and mostly your example, has played a part in that. So thank you.

    • bgddyjim says:

      My pleasure, and your obvious progress has helped me to stay on the straight and narrow 700-23’s.

      The big rides are a little tricky. For me, it completely depends on the time of year. If it’s colder than 40 degrees (F) 40 miles is about all I can enjoy. After that, it’s work. Good luck my friend.

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