Seriously? According to reports, it’s true! It appears liberals/progressives (I repeat myself) around the US are flocking to gun stores to get their Trumpocalypse firearm and load up on ammo while they’re at it.
We can gloss over the irony that it’s about time liberals discovered that the Second Amendment to the Constitution covers more than recreational hunting but let’s not get too crappy, eh? ‘Tis a reason to celebrate!. No need to point out that if Republicans hadn’t blocked their attempts to block that Amendment, they’d be stocking up on sticks, stones and Rambo knives. Oh wait! Would those be Rambo knives recategorized as “assault knives”?! So make it “sticks, stones and butter knives”.
I digress! Let’s look at the positives! And I’ll offer you new whipper-snappers a tip or two, you know…. so you don’t accidentally kill yourself (or someone else)!
- We’re a little hysterical right now, so let’s take a deep breath. Oooooommmmm… Okay, calm? A person who voted for Donald Trump and happens to be disagreeing with you in a conversation is not a threat on your life or safety. That means you can’t actually shoot someone for disagreeing with you or for voting for Donald Trump. This may come as a surprise to you with all of the fake news out there in the New York Times, Washington Post, and coming out of NPR or your average ultra-liberal professor but it’s true. You cannot kill someone for not liking Big Government.
- The place for your pistol is not in the drawer or under your pillow if you have kids. “I told him/her not to go into my room” won’t bring them back. The pistol goes in a nice little quick access safe on the night stand.
- It will cost you $10,000 minimum in court/attorney costs if you’re caught pulling your weapon in public. If you shoot a person, even in true, blatant, obvious self-defense, $100,000 minimum in defense costs. You can’t afford the defense, so you better be sure before you even think of brandishing that weapon because you’re going into court with a public defender and a life sentence is a loooong time. Again, a “he/she hurt my feelings” defense will get you 25 to life.
- Practice, at a legitimate firearm range, drawing, aiming, and firing your pistol. Become comfortable with your firearm. Become a good shot. Learn which end is the business end. Learn where “the bullets go”. Practice.
- Being able to purchase a firearm does not allow one to carry it on their person in a concealed fashion. You need a special permit or license for that depending on your State Law – this goes to that “well regulated” part, and that goes (by design, ladies and gentlemen) by State. In mine, I had to go through a special course to prove that I was proficient with my firearm (and contrary to fake news, not everyone will pass… a guy two stalls down was failed instantly when we all had to duck because he didn’t know enough to keep his weapon pointed down range or flat on the table in front of him).
- After the course and test, expect a background check from the FBI. They put your fingerprints on file too.
- Carrying a concealed firearm without a license is a felony in all but one State (I believe one made it legal to carry without a license, or is in the process of doing so) though many do allow open carry. It’s my personal.preference to refrain from advertising though.
- Now, for a few lighter tips. Unlike many of y0ur liberal friends, we won’t give you $#!+ about purchasing a firearm or showing up at a range. We’ll welcome you to the club because that’s what we do. It’s about the Amendment and the Right, not you. Please learn from this and treat us accordingly – no need to try to shut down the firearm range you practice at to assuage your guilt for being there.
- Notice I used the words “pistol” and “firearm”, not “gun”? You played with toy guns when you played Zombie Apocalypse in the backyard as a kid. Pistols are not toys. Period.
- Hopefully this is where you realize all that hyperventilating by your side is silly and you’re at the point you’ve come to understand what an incredible responsibility owning a firearm is. Honor that responsibility, please.
Finally, to wrap this up, we on the right freaked out a little bit when President Obama was elected in ’08 so I can dig that you lefties are a touch discombooberated right now. We survived Obama (for the most part) and you’ll survive eight years of Trump (heh)…. Unless you happen to be a bureaucrat, in that case, Vaya con Dios. I hope that new post in Nome, Alaska is a peach. Bring a warm jacket, eh.
It’s about damn time, too.
With that, welcome to the club!