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Why Green Vegan Smoothies are such an Integral Part of a Weight Loss Diet


You know those nasty, blended vegan, green goop smoothies…  The smoothies they say are an “acquired taste” that, in terms of flavor, really come in somewhere between dirt and your lawn clippings?

I tried one.  Once.  It was much worse than I’d imagined it could be.

They are great for weight loss though.  Blend one up, take a sniff of it (or a tiny sip if you must, to get maximum stomach turnage), then pour it right into the toilet.  Save yourself the trouble of trying to choke that $#!+ down.

That and a cup of coffee, and there’s your breakfast.  Three or four calories on the daily  count.

Wait, I’ve had an epiphany!  Why not just buy a bike, ride the wheels off it and opt for the bacon, egg and cheese bagel instead?

Yes, indeed.  That’s more like it.


15 Comments

  1. Yes!!! That is my philosophy exactly. I have to train relentlessly as I enjoy my food eat way too much to diet. It’s simple, want a chocolate bar, do another 30 minutes workout, want that pizza, ride another hour!

  2. Gail says:

    Perfectly written and explained!!! What is the point of life if you grimace everytime you eat something? I drink smoothies all the time…without the protein powder. Don’t need it. Just fresh fruit, some ice, sometimes I do add a bit of spinach (happen to like the taste) and I will drink that for either lunch (if I’m in a hurry) or an afternoon snack. Fill it up with greens though?? Nope, nope and nope. Not for moi.

  3. Sheree says:

    I’m with you on that one. The only smoothies I like are ones I make.

  4. You should try puking on your shoes, which I just did thinking about that green shit going down my throat.

  5. theandyclark says:

    bgddyjim,

    I know you find this cool – Pedaling past Parkinsons – https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LRGCWIOeTC0

  6. MJ Ray says:

    Bacon’s still pretty risky, so keep it moderate, and grill not fry. No need to drink stuff you don’t like, but you still can’t outride a bad diet.

    • bgddyjim says:

      Right you are, but for burgers you grill. Bacon you bake on a rack. Let’s not get lost in the weeds, though… We can’t outride a bad diet, yes. We can outride a good diet with fun food.

  7. saoirsek says:

    A week drinking these and you lose a ton of weight…and the will to live. LOVE the last pic🙂

  8. Alyssa says:

    Too funny! They definitely take some getting used to 🙂

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