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Another “Yet” in Addiction that I won’t have to Experience. Recovery is Damage Control against “Yet’s”.


My friends, as an addict I’ve done some pretty repugnant shit. I was a liar, a cheat, and a thief as well as an addict.

Many people complain about the stigma associated with addicts. I am not one of them – I earned every bit of that stigma. You want to say I was a loser? You would have been right. I was. Honesty is the best policy and I was a tornado in the lives of anyone I came in contact with. What people like us do creates that vaunted, much maligned stigma. The point of the stigma and recovery is to sober (or clean) up and choose not to be that asshole anymore. Without the stigma you’d have people trying to just sober up rather than fix what’s really wrong. No thanks, that kind of recovery is for losers and I choose not to be one of those… Yet.

The other day, driving down to Ann Arbor to pick up my daughters’ team swimsuits I saw a friend of my wife’s working the expressway exit ramp. Not panhandling, mind you, she’d become a crack whore.

Now I suppose I shouldn’t use the term “crack whore” to describe her, even if it does fit, because I wouldn’t want to offend the sensibilities of a certain segment of… Oh, f*ck that. She fell far enough to literally be a crack whore.

My friends, that is a “yet” for me. I haven’t ever been a crack whore… yet (or any other drug whore, for that matter). That “yet” is out there waiting for me, though. If I choose to pick up.

So, most of you are probably wondering, did I stop and save her from her life of drugs and prostitution?

Um, no. I sped away from there as fast as I could and called my wife. Let her deal with it. I’m a married man, folks. Jesus dealt with whores, but he was a lot better at that temptation stuff than I am. I got the hell out of there. To thine own self be true. I have no business in the presence of that crap… lest those “yets” start becoming “oh yeah, I did that yesterday’s”. No thanks.

As for your stigma, cry me a river… played on the world’s smallest violin.


  1. tammi1438 says:

    I totally admire your honesty. It’s so missing with so many who call themselves “in recovery” today.

  2. unironedman says:

    Nice post, Jim. Great song too. But it has to be the Julie London version, of course.

  3. joliesattic says:

    You sounded angry and sad. You’ve come a long way and I’m guessing it pains you to see others you may have associated with still wandering the sea of addiction. Keep up the good work. Isn’t it nice that you are in a place where you can be “picking up team swimsuits” and being connected to your daughter and that you know your limitations? I so admire your perseverance and as Tammi says honesty.

    • bgddyjim says:

      Definitely not angry, not even a little bit. We do a lot of nasty things to keep our disease fed. It is what it is, as they say.

      • joliesattic says:

        Okay. Good to know. I have many addictive family, but knowing that has helped me be proactive. I guess it’s not unlike my “addiction” to certain sweets. I can’t even have them in the house, so I don’t buy them or bring them into my home or they’ll be gone all at one time to the point of getting ill. Fortunately, once they’re gone, I’m good for another couple of years. I know it’s not the same, but that’s as close as I can get to comprehending. I’m appreciative you share your story so honestly with all of us.

      • bgddyjim says:

        That’s pretty close, actually… alcohol just kills you quicker and the ramifications for abuse are vastly worse.

  4. Patunia says:

    πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜ŽπŸ˜ŽπŸ˜Ž But for real though….. πŸ™„πŸ™„πŸ™„

  5. saoirsek says:

    When I went to my first session with an alcohol counselor ( who turned out to be a nasty creep, but to be fair directed me towards AA) he asked me if I’d ever been in prison. I was totally offended (haha) and very indignantly said β€œ No!” But then he asked me if I ever COULD have been…hmmmm. Well that was a big fat yes, my behavior had been pretty tricky on occasion, I’d just been lucky. Rigorous honesty. On another note, a member who has been in and out of the rooms for years went back out last week and broke her neck, now there’s a β€œ not yet” I hadn’t thought about πŸ™

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