Now, look, I’m not about to sit here and say to Bob, “Hey, Bob, because you don’t have “x” number of bikes, you can’t be an enthusiast like me”. That would be stupid, ignorant, and repugnant. I’m not that kind of guy and this won’t be that kind of post.

That said, let’s break it down for shits and giggles.

You need one bike. Preferably a gravel or cross bike with two sets of wheels, one for the road and one for the dirt.

With that you can do anything… except snow.  Crap, forgot about the snow.  Okay, so let’s make the bare minimum, two bikes. A fat bike for the winter and a cross bike with two wheelsets. Bob’s your uncle.

That doesn’t really get it, though, does it? Let’s face reality… You’re going to be out of the fast group rides because you’ll be at a disadvantage with that gravel bike. Let’s go with three bikes. Add a sweet carbon fiber aero road bike. You can use the gravel/cross bike with two sets of wheels for a rain bike.

Wait a minute, though… You’re going to want to chill on the mountain bikes with your buds in the fall, right? That fat bike is going to be cool and all, but let’s face facts; that fat bike is for the snow and it’ll be slow, right? You don’t need a disadvantage trying to hang with your friends. Right!

You’ll need a mountain bike, too.

So let’s make that four bikes. A mountain bike, an aero road bike, a fat bike, and a gravel bike… with two wheelsets.

Then you see a classic you’ve gotta have. Better make that five. Besides, you can use that as a rain bike and hammer almost as fast as you would on the race bike.  Yeah.  Five works.

That’s not quite the done of it, though, now that I think of it…  You’re going to need another mountain bike for your really nasty days.  One of those, “I don’t care how gnarly it gets outside.  Sometimes you just gotta ride!” bikes.

I may have to paint this one black…

So let’s make that six.  Six bikes should do.

Oh, shit.  What about a track bike?!  And a time trial bike?!

Hang on, Baby Jesus.  This is gonna get bumpy…

You need a lot of bikes.  A whole lot of them.  In fact, you’d better invest in a bigger house while you’re at it.

Or just ride what you’ve got an be happy.  That works too.