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How to Look Cool on a Bike, According to Brian Holm

A fun article to check out about how to avoid looking like a doofus on a bike – something that I take very seriously (as we all know).

While I agree with the crux of the article, and with seven of the nine bullet points, I couldn’t agree more (can we say “bullet” points still, or is that a trigger [heh]?).

I’ll just focus for a second on two that don’t fit. First, under “A racing bike should look like a racing bike” or “Don’t look like a triathlete “, the main rule is a bike should have white bar tape. So sayeth Brian Holm, the director sportif of Etixx Quick Step in 2015.

One could imagine I would have a problem with that rule:

While I couldn’t possibly argue against a race bike looking like a race bike, as mine is a perfect specimen, it is inarguable that white bar tape could fit on my race bike. Impossible.

In fact, and this is a little funny to me, if you look at Brian’s photo in the article, you should be able to pick out the delicious irony. Raspberry flavored.

Second up is no cycling cap under the helmet. He’s got a point, it’s hard to argue, but I just don’t want to follow this one. Brian is in opposition to the Velominati rules as well, which state cycling caps may only be worn when engaged in a cycling activity… Well, you can’t wear one on the bike and you can’t wear one off it? Forgive me if I call Bull$#!+.

The rest are rock solid and right on – especially the sleeveless jersey rule!

Enjoy! And comment down below if you must.

UPDATE: Sheree, in the comments section, makes the excellent point that these items don’t apply the same to ladies. A woman can pull off a sleeveless jersey without batting an eye. A guy couldn’t do that with enough makeup to make Tammy Fae Baker, in her hay day, blush. Except whilst in the process of completing a triathlon.

Also, short shorts are unquestionably a no-no for a guy, but fantastic for women.

Call it a double-standard, it is what it is, boys.

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