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The Daily Reflections Post from the Other Day; I Was Once Lost…

January 2020

Anyone who has read my blog knows how I feel about my addicted past. I was a miserable, useless, POS. That description doesn’t bode well with today’s insufferable “love me as I am” movement which will create more relapse, demoralization, loss and death than it helps.  Very few, if any, will benefit from this extension of the long discredited “Dr. Spock” method of recovery.  It’s sad how intelligent people cling to idiocy in the name of “feelings”.

“In A.A. we aim not only for sobriety—we try again to become citizens of the world that we rejected, and of the world that once rejected us. This is the ultimate demonstration toward which Twelfth Step work is the first but not the final step.”

— AS BILL SEES IT, p. 21

The world that once rejected us… but note, we reject the world first, almost every time.

The world was right to reject me because I rejected it.  This is as it should be. I didn’t care about one person on this rock who got in the way of my addiction. I would lie, cheat, steal, and manipulate to stay drunk and high.  I didn’t care what the effects were.

The world treated me as I was, not some silly notion of who I’d be if only [fill in the blank here]. I was treated as I deserved.

The result is different today, though I’m still treated as I deserve.  I am treated better by “society” because I treat “society” better.  I’m a productive part of it.  To wish otherwise, to hope that society will treat us as productive members of it when we’re clearly not, is folly.  It’s wrong-headed, ignorant, and narcissistic.

True happiness in recovery is only possible when we put aside that selfishness.

I only hope this post doesn’t cause anyone to spontaneously combust from the raw truth expressed here.


  1. unironedman says:

    Arrah truth be told this is true (or should be) for all citizens of the world, regardless of addiction (though I don’t belittle that in any way, of course). We’d all be better off if we were less selfish and treated others as we ourselves wished to be treated. JFK said something along those lines.

  2. abq1003 says:

    This is a truth that a lot of people struggle with, I totally relate though… I used to be a piece of shit when I was in active addiction… the world treated me like shit.
    It turns out if you do good, good things come. Not always right away but if you keep your eyes open the good is everywhere.

  3. joliesattic says:

    Oh, gag me. The “society norm” is crippling rather than helping the addicted. It saddens me. It is not unlike an ungoverned child.

  4. biking2work says:

    Thanks for these posts Jim. They’re keeping me focussed right now, along with slowly reading the Big Book.

  5. “I didn’t care about one person on this rock who got in the way of my addiction.” This truth is always a humbling gut punch. Thanks for this, brother.

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