When is working on a personal defect, even an immensely profound and deep defect, not a struggle? Part One
In my post yesterday I mentioned that I’m on the cusp of a new level of recovery. In the last paragraph of the post, after describing a character defect through every word before, I expressed excitement on learning I have something so big to tackle.
This will be work, I’m not kidding myself about that reality, but what I tried to express in that last paragraph is that I’m not going into this negatively, either. I’ve been through enough in recovery to know beyond a shadow of a doubt, that what comes after I’ve done the work and made the necessary repairs will be a new freedom and a new happiness that I previously hadn’t been capable of grasping. It’s going to be work, sure, but the benefits that come with the effort are sweet.
When I first arrived at the program’s doorstep, I had a tendency to view the work of recovering as a chore or something that would cause emotional pain – and sometimes it was and did. I quickly learned that what follows the work always makes the work worth the effort.
When I work on fixing character defects, I work on being happy and free from the bondage of that crap. While it may be work, it’s nothing to be afraid or negative about. On the contrary, having my eyes opened to something I’d never been able to see is a gift. While we call it a “struggle” melodramatically, I’ll be thankful for what comes after the struggle is over.
This next mess won’t have claw marks on it when I let it go. I’ll wave good-bye with a smile on my face.
Just a thought.