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Sometimes it takes years to understand ‘Why’…


January 2014

Often it can take years to understand the ‘why’ of something, for everything to take shape in such a way that one can see the full picture.  If lucky… or perhaps more properly stated, if we are paying attention, we can look back and have that “ah-ha” moment.   That moment of clarity when we understand that not only was the work necessary, it was worth it.

I’m going to break my anonymity a bit for this post, I hope you’ll survive, I know I will.  I wrote yesterday about feeling a little bit sad about my first day back at the office.  While it is advised to let it happen and roll with it, I don’t like being sad, about anything.  I talked to my wife for a few minutes about how I was feeling and got on with my day.  I was taught long ago to “feel it” until I’m ready to change that feeling, until I’m done with it and ready to take action.

Action I took.  I felt sad until I was tired of it and then took to fixing it.  I left the office a little bit early to drop some paperwork off to the proper people on my dad’s behalf and called my sponsor and talked things over with him on the way.  The conversation maybe lasted ten minutes and we talked about the five stages of grief and how I could move forward, a few books I could peruse and so forth.  I dropped off the paperwork and by the time I got home I was in a much better place.

Once in a great while though, you get to see the ‘why’ happen in a matter of hours.  Sitting on the couch about 7 last evening and my brother called to say that he was feeling odd because he was going through an unexpected sad/melancholy stretch that he couldn’t quite put his finger on…  Imagine that.

I gave him a chance to talk about what he was going through then explained what I’d gone through earlier – and more importantly, how I dealt with it and turned the situation into something positive.  When the conversation wound down we both resolved to pick the phone up a little more often.  Folks, I’m here to tell you, it just doesn’t get any better than that in my world.

Expectedly, I feel like a hundred bucks today.


  1. Gary Smith says:

    Nice post, Jim. Glad you’re feeling better.

  2. sueslaght says:

    Such a wonderful feeling to have those moments where the big picture of life grows clearer. Glad to hear you are feeling better.

  3. The Guat says:

    Nice to hear that you could talk it out with your brother and that you’re feeling better. Dude so glad you had a good day.

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